Lights, Camera, Action

Okay, I've always had an over-active imagination and conscience.  In my mind I can see God looking over the edge of heaven and watching every move I make.  At times, I even envision Him with a video camera recording my mistakes for posterity.  It is like home movies for the paranoid.  I assume that one day we will all be in heaven and God will say, "Hey, I've got some really funny clips of Tracy Paino . . . let's have a look!"  Then my life will play on this big screen for everyone to see.

When I blow it in real life . . . not in my imagination . . . I think, "Boy, that's gonna suck when that gets replayed!"  In some way, this perpetual paranioa of God following me around with a film crew keeps me from making some very STUPID mistakes.  I have literally stopped words from coming out of my mouth, actions that would hurt others, selfish intentions because I think what this would look like on the movie of my life.  Would I want anyone else to see this?  Is this something I want God the Father and Jesus to critique like some divine Siskel and Ebert? 

 Some would call this being "camera shy" others would say it's the "fear of God."  Whatever it is, it shows me that I'm a terrible movie director.  That is why I need the Holy Spirit to (literally and figuratively) direct my life.  It becomes so important to meet with him THROUGHOUT the day (not just in the morning!) and be open to his direction.

 Am I hearing things or did someone just say, "LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION?"